A Love Letter to Tour Families

Tour families, show families, music families, cults… Call them what you will. It’s both weird and the most natural thing in the world that these are the people that you can count on for anything.

These people who you may not have more in common with than the love of a certain band, and who you may not have known for more than a month or a year—they’re the ones who you know will spoil you and watch out for you better than anyone else.

They’re the people who won’t judge you for how far you traveled for a show, or how many shows you’re seeing on one tour.

They’re the people who give you their extra ticket to a show you hadn’t planned on going to, or offer to help pitch in to buy you an unnecessarily expensive ticket off of StubHub because they think you SHOULD be at that show.

They’re the people who drive you to and from out-of-state shows and split hotel rooms with you.

They’re the people who pick you up when you fall in the mosh pit, and make sure you’re okay when you take a headbutt to the jaw.

They’re the people who will loan you their early entry ticket.

They’re the people you have inside jokes with before you even really know them, because you can quote lyrics at each other and other people won’t understand.

They’re the people who understand why you love what you love, because they love it just as much.

They’re the people who are always down to start a singalong with you regardless of where you are.

They’re the people who give you a big “FUCK YEAH” when you wind up at a secret show on the opposite side of the country from them. Jealous, but still happy for you.

They’re the people who are on board with all of your ridiculous ideas like smuggling glitter into a venue.

They’re the people who offer to drive an hour both ways to pick you up from the airport at midnight.

They’re the people who offer to let you sleep on their couch even when they know the timing conflicts with the birth of their first child.

They’re the people who always without fail have a couch for you to sleep on, no matter the circumstances.

They’re the people you don’t hesitate to get matching tattoos with. (Or maybe hesitate just a bit.)

They’re the people who constantly blow up your phone with group chats.

They’re the people you take time off work to go visit regardless of whether a show is happening or not.

They’re the people you click with instantly and feel like you’ve been best friends with for years even when you’ve only known them for a short time.

They’re the people you end up living with when you move cross-country.

They’re the first people to message you to make sure you’re okay when you’re having a shitty day.

They’re the people who truly make you feel like you belong somewhere.

While the music is definitely a big part of it, they’re the real reason you keep going to shows, and it feels wrong when they’re not there with you.

I’m lucky enough to have found myself in four music families. All of the love to my Idiots, Children of the Fence, Infernites, and my Matches family (which unfortunately has not yet decided on a name. Hey guys. Can we get on that please?).

I think it’s kinda funny how each one thinks there’s no other fandom out there quite like theirs, because I’m the person who’s found a home in more than one. I know they’re more or less all the same. Does that make them any less amazing? Absolutely not. You find a home where you find a home, and I’m beyond thankful for all of mine.

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